Electronic
perfumed cigars? Lighten up!
by James Leavey
There are strong
signs that Ireland is at last witnessing the green shoots of recovery after the
fall of the Celtic Tiger.
Or maybe it's
just the shamrock growers getting ready for St Patrick's Day (March 17 – you
heathens!).
Whatever. To me, it's just another great excuse to
celebrate life with a fine cigar.
Talking of which,
a fellow nicotine lover recently asked me why you rarely see a priest in an
Irish cigar shop.
'That's because
nobody under the age of 18 is allowed in,' I told him.
Talking of
feckin' chancers, some of those shady companies trading in electronic
cigarettes are thinking about extending their range to include perfumed
electronic ciggies, and, God Help Us and Save Us, electronic fucking cigars.
Now here's the
thing...it turns out these electronic devices that appear to simulate a smoke
are more dangerous than the real thing.
It's that liquid nicotine they use to suck in smokers.
Besides, any
tobacco that needs the addition of another flavour is, in my opinion, not worth
igniting.
That includes
those cheap cigarillos flavoured with all kinds of noisome shite.
Think about
it...if the tobacco in a cigar is good
it doesn't need enhancing or ruining with something else.
And as most of
the flavours suggested for electronic puffs or any other electronic
alternative tobacco products, is sweet...they may appeal to young idiot
potential smokers who have already been conned into serious boozing via
alco-fucking-pops.
The fact is that
most of those companies who have leapt onto the anti-smoking bandwagon don't
actually want their customers to stop smoking.
They just want them to try and quit, and with this in mind sell them a
piece of crap at vastly inflated prices.
It's cheaper and
far better to smoke less by smoking better – so maybe it's time to switch to
the occasional premium Havana instead of chain-smoking cheap tobacco.
Meanwhile, the
anti-smoking lobby want to take over the smoking market but don't seem to be
too bothered – unlike the tobacco companies they are trying to take down – to
produce alternative smoking products that are actually safe to use.
As for electronic
cigars...maybe they should only produce very wide girth, long versions into
which they can insert a couple of AA batteries, turn them into vibrators, and
stick them up their arse.
Now, for those of
you who are serious dedicated cigar lovers like myself, may I suggest you turn
your attention to some of the new cigars on the market and currently available
from The DCE in Dublin, especially the Don Antonio premium long filler
Dominican brand which comes in three tubed sizes: the Churchill, the Lonsdale,
and, my absolute favourite, the delightfully smooth and more-ish Don Antonio Robusto.
And the great
thing is, it doesn't need batteries.
